Have You Lost Faith in Yourself?
(How to strengthen your resolve and take back the day!)
I’ve got to create some new marketing to build my audience. I know its high-value work that needs to be done by me. It’s critical to my business and my goals. So I sent up an appointment with myself to do it. I block off an hour of time tomorrow afternoon to tackle it.
Have You Ever Set an Appointment With Yourself?
You put you in your calendar, and there it is. But there’s something different about that appointment with yourself. In the back of your mind, it’s just with you so you have some flexibility.
Back to my story. The next day a client calls and needs to talk so what do I do? I give him my hour.
Have You Ever Missed an Appointment With Yourself?
To be honest, most of us have. We set a time block for ourselves but then a client calls, we get distracted, we have to run an unexpected errand, we need a break, we need some food, one of our team members needs something or you get a call from your spouse or kids.
The problem is that every time we miss that appointment, that commitment to ourselves we lose a little bit of our confidence, our faith in ourselves. How do you feel when someone misses an appointment with you? How do you feel when they commit to being with you then ghost you or cancel at the last minute? They don’t value your time or your relationship. Every time you miss that appointment with yourself, you are doing that to yourself. Over time you will lose faith in yourself. It may not come all at once, but the little cuts in the relationship with yourself will add up to some serious issues with your self-respect and self-esteem.
How Do We Turn This Around?
How do we keep these appointments with ourselves and build, not tear down, the relationship we have with ourselves? It just takes a few things, here’s the shortlist…
Honor the Time with Yourself by Building an Iron Cage around It
You have to stop the distractions and interruptions during your time. Put up the “Do not disturb unless there’s a fire” sign on your door. Set up agreed-upon times where you will not be interrupted by staff. If they can’t find you they can’t interrupt you so consider working from home in the morning for an hour or so. Take a long lunch and find a quiet spot for your high-value appointments with yourself. Go into Airplane Mode on your phone. It’s not just for Airplanes! You can quickly triage any issues that come up while you are disconnected from the world.
Win Early & Win Often
I often say “Win Early and Win Often”. Set appointments with yourself earlier in the day – maybe before work starts – before the day gets away from you. Set smaller appointments with yourself perhaps only 30 minutes. Dial down the resistance you have for holding commitments with yourself. Build-in buffer time – don’t over-schedule yourself. When you keep even the smallest commitment to yourself it builds momentum. It’s energizing to win and brain chemicals are released to make you feel good and do more – done is the engine of more! Be sure to avoid deadlines of disappointment they lower your energy and your results. Chunk it down to the doable so you can win early and win often.
Don’t Miss It (Even if It’s Shorter)
You have to make yourself a priority – ABOVE clients, interruptions, others’ agenda’s, rabbit holes and distractions. Ask yourself – Am I important? You live with yourself every day – and honor that person, you are the most important person – if you are not right with yourself, then you can’t serve others as effectively and get the results you want in business and life. Even if you have to cut your appointment with yourself down to just a few minutes – do that – keep it. There’s a psychological advantage to not missing it – even if it’s just for 5 or 10 minutes.
Your Faith in Yourself Will Skyrocket
As you keep commitments to yourself – you will change. Your faith in yourself will improve. Your productivity of high-value work, insights, and innovations will go up. Your self-confidence will go up. Your ability to handle pressure and stress will go up. Your happiness levels will go up. You can use both leaps and little steps of time. As little as 10 or 15 minutes to full 2-hour time blocks or half days!
If you still struggle to keep those appointments with yourself then ask yourself some questions.
What am I afraid of, if I put my relationship with myself at a high level?
How can I help others if I can’t help myself?
Why am I giving myself a lower priority?
Don’t fall into a limiting belief of self-blame or self-disrespect. Those are false – you are your most important client. Start your appointment momentum right now. Schedule some time with yourself and be sure to make the first step fun and fast to get started – remember – win early and win often.
Now set an appointment with yourself to take control and make it a great day!… Blaine
Blaine Oelkers is a lifetime entrepreneur, graduate of Purdue University and Stanford University’s Entrepreneurship program. He’s achieved over 100 Million dollars in sales and coached thousands of people. He’s America’s Chief Results Officer® and Day Ahead™ Specialist helping business owners go from being a day behind to being a day ahead in business and in life. He’s the world’s greatest creator of valuable doneness. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
To learn more visit www.BeingADayAhead.com
Boy did I need to hear this! I was struggling to get things done. Felt down in the dump for no reason. This article explained a lot! I am going to start making appointments with myself!! Great article!